unsent...(on the edge)

When to know that we need to catch our breath and pause for awhile? When to know that we need to give ourselves a little respect ? When to know how to be selfless? When to know to stop and let everything fall into right places?...Lately, i guess ive learned to know it...After all those things that happened, i have to scream and force myself to literally STOP!!!...Trying to see things clearly as possible...Though sometimes ive been blinded by regrets and hurt...I feel more calm and peaceful now...Knowing when to stop and pause for a while make us see things better and clearer...It help us admire the simple and little things in life that we overlook most of time...Most of all it reminds me that i have (Sandy) to save my day..

...uncertainties

"...why love went out of hand? and now there's nothing i can do.."
...(uncertainties- the biggest torture in love)...ive crossed the line...the line that i invisibly put in this kind of situation... testing the water is really a bad idea after all...now its drowning me...back into a deep abyss where i used to be...

unsent(march29)

"...i know it makes no sense but what else can i do? how can i moved on when im still in love with you?.."
( wish i could hold on to what i promised to myself...) ..this is the beauty of maturity, you can never try so hard on things but you can leave them...but the hardest part is if you can leave things behind without traces of regrets/sadness/bitterness...oftentimes "flight" response kicked us the hardest!...when we turned our back without saying words, when we leave without saying goodbye, when we let the time take its toll, when we realize we should done something--and that's when we are hurt more...

"...dont let anybody hold your happiness with their hands..hold it within yours!...stay happy...its not merely an emotion but its also a choice.."

unsent(jan.8)

"..there's a right or wrong to know for everything..and the truth is always written
in between..there is always mising in the dark..there you find the true conditions
of the heart.."

OOPS!!....I did it again..regrets?,,nah!..tsaka na lng..as for now that word does'nt sink in to my mind..in comparison, i can handle it this time..maybe i have conditioned myself for this or its because the past made me stronger this time...the irony--tsk,tsk!...Honestly, i just feel alright about it but thats what im worrying about---to come to a point that "it just alright"!..(sigh!)..Anyway...this is much better than with RA...no strings attached, no pressure,...ff...thats it!..

UNSENT(nov3)

"..every now and then i find myself wondri'n about you baby..since now and again
i cant escape the thought of all the "might have been"..every now and then.."

..arrgh!..reliaty bites.. what im acting lately is all about pretensions--pretending that everything is fine when in fact anguish burns inside me..im holding myself not to do something foolish as an escape for this..trying to keep myself compose and calm..i just hope i still can rationalized things..

....unsent(nov309)

"..so long my luckless romance my back is turned on you..i should have known
you give me heartaches..almost lover always do.."

...sigh.. why do i let myself fall on your trap?..i know everything is clear to me..your purpose,your motives and what you only like and yet i still go on with my stupidity..but that's enough..lam ko nman walang patutunguhan to..i cannot live on the lies that this relationship brings...there is too much lies..you know that..dont give me the crap that everything is just fine..maybe its enough that i have become a help during the times that you need one..and thats the only help i can give you..if you just took advantage of me, i will just accept the fact that you did..wala na kong magagawa nagyari na..you will be one of those experiences that, in one way or another,help me become bitter or better person..